The French and how
to Intergrate
To begin with, a short, slightly
tongue in cheek History of France.
A SHORT
HISTORY OF FRANCE
Gallic
Wars - Lost. In a
war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of
French history, France is conquered by of all things,
an Italian.
Hundred Years
War - Mostly lost,
saved at last by female schizophrenic who
inadvertently
creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's
armies are
victorious only when not led by a
Frenchman."
Italian Wars
- Lost. France becomes
the first and only country to ever lose
two wars when
fighting Italians.
Wars of
Religion - France
goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots.
Thirty Years
War - France is
technically not a participant, but manages
to get
invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that
eventually the other
participants started ignoring
her.
War of
Devolution - Tied.
Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as
chapeaux.
The Dutch War
- Tied.
War of the Augsburg
League/King William's War/French and Indian War
- Lost,
but claimed as a
tie. three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles
the
world over to label the period as the height of
French military power.
War of the Spanish
Succession - Lost.
The War also gave the French their
first taste of a
Marlborough, which they have loved every since.
American
Revolution - In a
move that will become quite familiar to
future
Americans, France claims a win even though the
English colonists saw far
more action. This is later
known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the
Second
Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America
does most of the fighting."
French
Revolution - Won,
primarily due the fact that the opponent was
also
French.
The Napoleonic
Wars - Lost.
Temporary victories (remember the First
Rule!) due to
leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match
for a
British footwear designer.
The Franco-Prussian
War - Lost.
Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat
boy to
France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
World War I
- Tied and on the way to
losing, France is saved by the United
States. Thousands
of French women find out what it's like to not only
sleep
with a winner, but one who doesn't call her
"Fraulein." Sadly, widespread
use of condoms by
American forces forestalls any improvement in the
French bloodline.
World War II
- Lost. Conquered French
liberated by the United States and
Britain just as they
finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
War in
Indochina - Lost.
French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the
Dien
Bien Flu.
Algerian
Rebellion - Lost.
Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by
a
Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and
produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can
always beat the French." This rule is identical to
the
First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans,
English, Dutch, Spanish,
Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
War on
Terrorism -
France, keeping in mind its recent history,
surrenders
to Germans and Muslims just to be safe.
Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail
after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
Have a look at this
delightful article by Miles Kington
French
Eating Habits
For most
people in France, the day begins with breakfast, which
is known as le petit déjeuner. This usually consists of
coffee or hot chocolate which is drunk from a bowl, and
pehaps a freshly-baked croissant which is made of a
flaky, butter-based pastry or bread. Pain au chocolat
is similar but has a chocolate filling. Lunch is
traditionally a leisurely affair, and can have several
courses. The first course, or hors d'oeuvre, is often a
salad, or in winter a bowl of soup. A main dish of meat
or fish follows, and the meal ends with cheese, fruit,
or sometimes a dessert. At around four o'clock,
children who have just returned from school might have
some bread with jam or chocolate, and a glass of milk.
This afternoon snack is known as le goûter. For many
French people, the evening meal is a time for the whole
family to gather together and talk about their day.
Again, this often consists of several courses
(depending on how big lunch was), and for the adults,
might be accompanied by a glass or two of wine.
L’Apéritif is a national custom in France, which
involves setting aside half an hour or so before a meal
to share a drink, nibbles, and conversation with
family, friends, neighbours, or colleagues. It is a
firmly established social activity which is enjoyed by
people of all ages, and which forms an important part
of home life, of public and private celebrations, and
of café and restaurant culture.
And French food is pretty food. Even when the meal is
simple, it is elegantly presented.
This is "peasant" food in its purest form — made from
native vegetables, fruits, herbs, local cheeses, fresh
milk and cream, freshly baked breads. This vast array
of high-quality ingredients defines French food. French
cooking is the ultimate in"herby" cooking (as opposed
to spicy). From sultry bay leaves to aromatic lavender,
herbs further define French cuisine. The list is
endless — basil, tarragon, rosemary, fennel, chives,
savory, oregano, chervil, thyme, sage, parsley,
marjoram, etc.
The French are also experts at using foods to their
full potential. A cow is not simply steak and ribs. It
is brains, pancreas, kidneys, and much more. A pig,
similarly, becomes pigs feet, smoked ham, and saucisson
(sausage). Goose parts include the delicacy foie gras
(liver) as well as an integral part of cassoulet
(multi-meat and bean stew). Forests are foraged for les
truffes (truffles), mushrooms, and wild boar. Oceans,
lakes, and rivers provide fish, mussels, eel, and
shellfish. And there is more — rabbit, frogs legs and
snails...
French people consider eating well a necessary part of
their birthright. Although eating habits have changed
over the last couple decades, primarily as the result
of the introduction of fast food, the French way of
eating remains steadfast.
Meals are an important part of French leisure activity.
Meals are more about culture and tradition than simply
food or drink. They are about relaxing, good
conversation, friends, and family.
Breakfasts are small — often une baguette (long, skinny
French bread) or croissant (flaky horn-shaped pastry)
with butter and jam, accompanied by cafe au lait
(coffee with milk).
The leisurely mid-day meal has traditionally been the
largest meal. It is typically a family meal that
involves multiple courses designed in harmony. It is
not about excess or extravagance.
The first course is meant to "whet" the appetite. It is
called the hors d'oeuvre (appetizer), although
different what what Americans think of as "finger
food." It can be sausage, pate, raw vegetables
(crudites), soup, or even sardines.
The second or main course (les plats) might be a
seafood stew, fried steak, or a tart filled with
tomatoes, sausage, and olives — depending, of course,
on the region seasonal ingredients. Simple salads of
tender greens tossed with oil and vinegar, are served
to refresh the palate following the main course, And
finally, cheese and fruit to finish.
The evening family meal is smaller, but not necessarily
less elaborate. The main course can include fish,
roasted chicken, or lamb stew, all served with
vegetables. This course can be preceded by
complementary soups, salads, or egg dishes. Cheese and
fruit follow as well.
In Britain, the meat course would be considered the
meal's focus or entree. However, each course of a
French meal commands equal respect . Braised veal,
therefore, would not demand any more attention than the
fresh watercress salad or a quiche. It is almost as if
the French meal is a lovely, harmonious string of side
dishes.
Bread always accompanies a meal, and French bread is
famous for good reason. It is tasty, hearty, and
crusty. Traditional long skinny loaves can be purchased
daily from family-run bakeries in all towns.
"Prix fixe" (fixed price) menus are common in French
restaurants. These are often the best deal, and offer
the finest in regional specialties. Dinners tend to be
more substantial, and lunches have become lighter and
simpler to serve the demands of today's busy diners.
When cheese is served at a restaurant, a wonderful
selection of cheese is presented to the diners, who
typically eat their selections with a fork. Restaurants
commonly offer desserts with their meals instead of
fruit. Depending on the season, these can include
clafoutis (fruit tart), creme caramel (caramel
custard), sorbet, or chocolate mousse.
When food shopping in France, it is advisable to look
into local specialities. Shop for breads, charcuterie
(delicatessen items), and the numerous varieties of
cheese for which France is world known.
Also shop farmer's markets for fresh produce that you
can take along on a picnic. Basic picnic items (bread,
fruit, cheese, sausage or pate) are inexpensive when
purchased at les epiceries (markets) and a French
picnic is just as unique and wonderful a French dining
experience as a meal in local cafe.
As for drinks, the French are big consumers of bottled
water, even though tap water in all parts of the
country is perfectly drinkable (but it doesn't
necessarily taste very nice). And, although France is a
wine-growing country, fewer and fewer French people are
regular wine drinkers.
US-style food (hamburgers, ketchup, soft drinks, etc.)
sadly are making inroads, especially with younger
people.
Luckily, though, French culinary tradition is still
rich and varied: every region of France has its own
special dish, cheese (there are as many varieties of
cheese in France as there are days in the year) and
wine. Influences are to be found everywhere- North
Africa, Spain, Vietnam and even the Italians!
How to Intergrate
The
importance of integrating into your new community in
France is often overlooked by new expats. There is an
assumption that you will learn the language simply by
virtue of living in France and that you will meet
like-minded people strolling around the markets.
Unfortunately, this is not very likely.
It is more likely that you and your partner will only
talk to each other most of the time, with the odd
‘merci’ to a supermarket assistant thrown in for good
measure. You may overhear other English voices, but why
would you become great friends with someone just
because you speak to same language? Were you friends
with every English speaker in the UK?
The likelihood is that the English voices you overhear
are retired expats and you are young professionals, and
vice versa. You may be able to say hello and enjoy a
brief ‘Englishman abroad’ chat, but this is not the
same as making friends with similar lives.
The truth is integrating into your new French community
is hard work. Certainly hard work that pays off in
time, but hard work none the less. Let us look at some
ideas to reduce the stress of integrating into your new
community.
Local Classes
However
small your new village or town is, there is bound to be
some sort of local class. There may only be a
belly-dancing club on offer, but to keep in with the
integration, join whatever there is. Ideally, you will
find a local class in a subject that interests you so
that you can meet like-minded people, but any local
class is a good way to get to know your local
community.
Artisans
Rather than
using all expat contacts for the tasks you will require
– building, plumbing, and TV installation – try using a
local artisan. This may be a little more frustrating
initially as you try to explain what you require, but
your local community will appreciate the business.
There are also potential grants and insurance benefits
for using local tradesmen.
Schools
Research has
shown that new expats with children find integrating
into their new French community easier than their
childless counterparts. This is especially true if you
children are under the age of ten, as younger children
tend to pick up the language and join in quicker than
older children. Either way, this gives you the perfect
opportunity to get to know other parents at school by
chatting at the school gates, attending social events
at school and getting involved in any fundraising
activities.
Local Shops
Use local
shops as much as possible. While there are plenty of
out of town shopping centres in France as in the UK,
part of the pleasure of living in France is the
wonderful local produce. Why not find out where and
when your local market is held and stroll down with
your basket? This is just what you dreamed about for
your new life in France, so let it happen rather than
filling up your trolley at the supermarket. Not only
will you find superior local products, but also you
will get a more personal service that gives you an
opportunity to pick up phrases.
Try the Language
When you
move to France, do not get into the habit of asking if
people speak English at every turn. French people
appreciate when you try to speak French, even if you
get it wrong. Indeed, it is often considered rather
endearing if you make a mistake. Do not try to
translate English phrases in your head and then say
them in French, listen to how people talk and you will
learn a more natural way of speaking.
Participate
In your
Village/town, there will always be local events- like a
Carnival, Bingo ( yes they love it- called Loto),
fairs, fetes and more. Get stuck in - the French love
participation and sharing- make a fool of yourself,
like they will of themselves. Also, when your French is
better, invite them over for an apéritif. Beware here
though. There is a basic apéro - a few drinks before
lunch/dinner - UK style. Then there is an apéritif
dignatoire- this can last till 2 a.m. ( as I learnt at
my first attempt); This is a food led drinks party -
keep the finger food coming!!! The French are very good
at helping themselves to food and drinks- encourage
them! Also, don't fill their, mainly wine, glasses too
high- not accepted.
Well armed now????? Chin chin
